Bum’s Rush

[landshark]

As the last days and hours of the Fair wind down, the kid in everybody starts to ooze out of your pores. It gets tough to continue to be a responsible business person and just focus on the dollar. Sooner or later, the Fair gets to you and your only option is to surrender to it and let go.

Last night, I stepped in some Fair Rat’s trap. It seems our dear friends at the Buck & Bum full throttle Western shop just past Times Square at the Fairgrounds had finally succumbed to the Fair. The owner took a thick leather brown wallet and screwed it good and secure into the asphalt walkway about five feet from the front of the store.

To any passer-by, it looked like someone dropped a very thick wallet. Ask me. I stopped, bent over, and tried to pick it up. Ha ha. Well, I stormed right over to the store and demanded to know who did that. When the owner made himself known as the culprit, I told him I love his game. Asking how much attention it has gotten, he told me he does it at every show and Fair he does all year long. While said everybody stops to pick it up, the best are police. They get so mad and frustrated they can’t pick it up. We had a good laugh.

And then I went to see for myself.

I went and stood a good distance away but with a clear line of sight to the wallet. Just to see, I set a ten minute time limit. Twenty one people stopped, bent over, kicked, and otherwise inquired of the wallet. To my untrained eye, it seemed that the bigger the waistline, the more likely the passerby was to first test the wallet with their feet to see if there was money in it.

It was a riot to see people struggle and suffer trying to rescue the wallet. Eventually a small group of people gathered around me and we started watching and enjoying the show. Trust me when I tell you that I could have stayed their for hours. It was stupid human tricks forever.

Then a Trooper came onto the scene. He stopped to look at the cowboy hats. I wanted him to quickly finish shopping so I could see his reaction to the wallet.

So,

I waited

And I waited

And that copper tried on nearly every damn hat in the store; showing off to his pretty female companion.

Alas, but he won and wore me down and I just gave up on waiting for him. I hope he found the perfect ten gallon hat.

I saw one last oversized woman check the wallet thoroughly with her toes and then meander off to find another meal.

On my way out the door, I passed by the Prayer Tent. I went in, knelt quickly, and prayed for 12 more days of the Fair.
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I dont want a life I can live with. I want a life I can't live without.