Buzzkill

[landshark]

Coming down from a delicious high that only the Fair can give normally is a slow gentle process. Floating back down to earth in the hours and days following the Fair, I normally just curl up in the warm memories and bask in the afterglow of two weeks of total escapism.

The divorces, the crimes, the nasty things people do to each other and the lawyers and judges who encourage them have been out of my mind for a couple of weeks. This morning, the ‘Day After’, in but a few hours, it is time to return to the world of the mundane and the ugly.

But, last night, my afterglow was cut short requiring me to quickly snap out of the bliss and rush headfirst back into reality. Grrrrrrrrr.

For twelve days of the Fair, I had not a cross word with anyone. Regardless of the crowd, the heat, or the toes squashed, it was always an exchange of pleasantries, apologies, and a grand smile as to how “it’s the Fair”. Around me idiots fought and yelled and proved the prowess of beer. But for me, it really was 12 days of “I love you, you love me, we are all one family”. The mental masturbation and emotional massage was prrrrrrrfect.

… that is until I exited the Fairgrounds.

As my tired and weary family struggled to find our last breaths of energy; we rose from a temporary respite during the last 6:00 p.m. parade around Chevrolet Court and headed out Gate One. The moment my feet hit the pavement outside the turnstile, the hard ugly reality hit me in the face. Literally. I took an elbow from a rushing baldheaded punk who just would not wait. Of course he apologized as I was about to eat his face off; but the damage was done. My mood darkened.

Approaching the Shoppingtown Centro pickup point, we saw but a few folks … including some friends. Thirty minutes later, still no bus but the crowd had now grown to a couple hundred people just for Shoppingtown. (Other routes had busses coming in 2 at a time every thirty seconds. The Shoppingtown run had none). The crowd, me included, being tired and ornery, started to balk and squawk at Centro personnel.

A bus Finally appeared. It pulled right up and before it could open its doors, some diminutive little old lady and her husband moved right up in front of the door as if ‘God forbid’ they were not going to be first on the bus. I stood and watched as she guarded her position of safety with the ferocity of a mother eagle protecting her nestlings. Being ‘first’ was her god given position in the world and she was going to die before anybody got between her and that door.

Unfortunately, the bus still had yet to disgorge its human cargo that had just come in from Shoppingtown. I suggested that the lady might want to step aside so the people can get off the bus. Her response was beautiful.

“Do you think I am stupid? Do you think I am an idiot?” she queried.

“I sure do!”, I fired back.

Fortunately, exiting passengers and a surging crowd caused a disruption in our discussion and I really tried to ignore her and choked down the rising bile. Serenity, now.

She wouldn’t let it go.

The driver poked his head out of the bus and told everyone the bus was going into the shop and was no longer in service. Now, thirty five minutes into standing around after standing around all day, with a surging crowd, … that news did not go down well.

… and the little old lady from Hades had to turn up the heat.

She turned to the three plump female hens who accompanied her and her drooling husband and cackled aloud about how all these “people” somehow snuck up from the back of the line. She inquired endlessly and maligned people who could not follow rules and stay in line. Blah blah blah. Obviously she had not seen me standing NEXT TO HER for the past 30 minutes. That mattered not.

Nor did it matter to her that the person who gets on the bus last arrives at the same time as the person who gets on first.

Cackle cackle cackle

Finally the bus arrives and she again stakes out her turf, pisses on the tire, and drags her husband and brood into the first two seats. She was at peace.

As for me … I and my kin enter the bus. The daughter and wife find comfy seats and I stood watch next to them. The ride to Shoppingtown was quick, air conditioned, and filled with the earsplitting sounds of an infant’s endless screaming.

Be it ever so humble,

THERE IS NO PLACE LIKE THE FAIR.


… until next year.


Buh bye
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I dont want a life I can live with. I want a life I can't live without.

[doboy116]

i wont take cetro to the fair anymore.

We went through the same thing with the buses( or absence of) a couple years ago. Sure, going TO the fair was lightning fast, so they can get you in and start spending the money they haven't even pried from my hands.

Going home was just like you described. Waited for over an hour for the bus, one bus, while over 200 peoplewairted to get back to their vehicles in Cicero.

never again, ill take my chances with the traffic!

[newtoCNY]

I'd rather wait. People-watching is great at the bus stop by the main gate. Part of the experience.

[crazycatlady]

usually takes the bus. I think he takes it because it is a good excuse as to why he is so late getting back to the drop off spot. The buses run but are usually late so he has an excellent excuse. I think I saw that same old hag last year!!!!!
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You know when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" Just once I want to say, "No, it's for company

[JQP]

Riding the bus back to the Regional Market, I was standing in the aisle behind a cute young lady. I was pretty steady, well-anchored so as not to sway too much and bump into people every time the bus turned. Cute lady in front of me was not. She wobbled every which way, including into me several time. Her butt touched my hand more times than I could count. She kept saying 'sorry'.

As we got off the bus she smiled at me and said good-bye. I felt like I should have at least offered her dinner.
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I want to run... I want to hide... I want to tear down the walls that hold me inside... [i]